I'll right I'm calling myself out on this one so, Mr. Black, take a seat. I am a fat faggot. Not the limp wrist-want-to-tickle your thighs fat, I mean fat as in hide your baby.
My wife and I took a drive just now to get our son to sleep as we usually do. Well during this drive my fat faggot ass consumed three hamburgers. "Oh Mr. White, that's not so bad" you might say. Well I consumed three hamburgers from two different fast-food joints. Still think it's ok? Well, it was from McDonalds and Jack n the box. Here's the thing though...it was two different McDonalds.. Yeah...I made three separate stops...
And I don't know what the hell my problem is but every time I reached for the bag through my window I grabbed it like a fat faggot retard. I couldn't just grab it normally no, I had to reach for the first one like my arm was half the length it actually is and that I had a deformed talon. add a goofy leprechaun grin and you get me. The second bag at the second McDeath I cupped my hand like I was getting change. They had to put the bag in my cupped retard faggot hand. The third bag I tried to correct the situation and pinched the bag with my thumb and fore finger with my elbow higher than my actually faggot hand.
Now this isn't normal behavior but I guess my lust for grease took hold of my motor functions and I became Burger Boy the Sad.
So why didn't I just get three burgers at one stop? Well my wife has a mouth like a sailor and I told her that if she kept cussing that I get a burger for every word.
This is turning out to be a delicious yet dangerous relationship. I need to practice my technique for tomorrow.